Graduation!

On December 11th I will be graduating from Western New Mexico University with my Bachelors in Elementary Education. I can't believe that after 6 years I am finally going to graduate from college! Finally! But now that the time has come it is extremely scary and overwhelming! My life is coming to a crossroads and I'm not sure which road to take. I always sorta thought that I would stay in Deming and start working on my Masters, but things have happened and situations changed and now I really really don't want to stay in Deming. I feel like there is nothing here for me. I have no real friends. I am a social person and I have NO social life here. Maybe if things had gone differently, I would be fine staying here, but I don't want to be here and be reminded.

Also in other news, I am going to be 25 in 8 days! OMGOSH! I cannot believe that I am that old. I know to some, it is not old, but to me it is! It's a quarter of a Century! Geez! But even with all that is going on in my life, I know that I can do it and my Heavenly Father is with me!

Here are some of my Graduation Pictures(taken by the amazing Britney Keeler)

Finally

So alot has changed for me. I finally found my laugh again...it's been a while. My last post was sad, but I am over that whole situation and am totally better off. He turned out to be one of the biggest jerks I have ever met, even if he was cute! The hurt is still there in my heart and it probably will be for a while, but at least I don't cry over him anymore; he doesn't deserve it anyways. I think the hurt will be here for a while, but at least I'm on the path to healing. I'm starting to feel like myself again. I started laughing easily yesterday and it was such a relief. I didn't think I'd ever get over it. But I FINALLY realized I'm worth more that pining and mourning over someone who is a total jerk and doesn't deserve me!
In the words of Marilyn Monroe, "If you can't handle me at my worst, you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best" Holla!

Life is not the way I planned

My LIfe is not going the way I planned, but I guess I shouldn't have expected it too. The whole dating thing has not gone the way I wanted, or even not wanted..it's been soo much worse. It consumes me and I really shouldn't let it. It's ridiculous that I can let someone have this much control over me, when he doesn't even care anything about me. He says the meanest things sometimes and yet, here I am still holding on. With the help of my friends, I've decided to delete him from my phone..to try and distance myself. We'll see how that goes. I just wish there was a delete button on my heart...

Last Days and Tragedy

I haven't blogged in a while and I'm sorry about that. I've been busy. I am back down in Deming to finish up with my schooling. I have 15 more credits to take and I will(0r hope to) be graduating from Western New Mexico University this December. FINALLY!

So Get ready for this story, because it's a long one

I got my car all packed up and ready so that I could leave on Sunday the 16th because I had class in Deming on the 17th. Well I get about an hour and a half outside of Farmington, exactly 9 miles from the Apache Nuggest Casion(the tee pee Casino) I know this because I was right next to the billboard. Anyways, my car starts making a funny noise and won't go when I put on the gas. I pull over and the Check Engine and the Oil light come on. I pop the hood and there is smoke coming out of the dipstick part and by the engine(not a lot, but still, smoke?) I checked the oil dipstick and I had NO oil. I was leaking it on the side of the road. I call my Dad told him what was up and he being the amazing Father that he is, came and got me. So I had to sit by myself in my car on the side of the road(flippin hot btw) for an hour and a half while he drove to get me. It was pretty much ok since I had TWilight on my ipod. And if you're wondering, No. nobody stopped to help me. sad day. Well my Dad got there and told me I had a hole in my Oil Pan(idk how it got there) and he tied a tow strap to my car and towed me home to Farmington. FOr those of you who have been towed, you know this, but for those of you who don't, being towed is difficult. I had to stay in my car and steer and push on the brakes so I didn't hit the truck. It was a long trip back, but I did well. I get home in time for Family Dinner(woo hoo) My Dad talks to my sister Julia and asks if I can use her car while he fixes mine so he doens't have to be working late into the night. She says that's fine(I totally love her! She is the best) so we unload my car and put all my stuff into hers(which it fits much better. I can actually see out the rearview mirror) --

sidenote: I truly am lucky to have the family that I have. I have a wonderful father that drops everything and comes and rescues me an HOUR AND A HALF away. I have a super sister who is willing to carpool and let me use her car so I can go to school. I am baffled at my good fortune with my family.

--So I drive down to Deming with the knowledge that my dad is going to fix my car and we will trade cars in Albuquerque sometime next week. It was a long journey, partly because Julias cruise control does not work and her Air Conditioner is seriously lacking. But i made it in one piece and unloaded everything AND made it to class. It was a good day....but it wasn't going to last long. On Tuesday evening while I was watching my newly purchased, "The Hannah Montana Movie" I receive a phone call from my Papa informing me that my dear dear friend aka my Car had died. He was working on it and the engine blew. It's unfixable and trying to fix it would cost more than the car is worth. Oh course I started to cry. That car has been in the family for 23 yrs. I got it from my Grandma when she died. It had sentimental value and so many good memories. I truly feel like a friend died. Also to add, I am totally not in a position to purchase a new car. My parents were willing to support me if I wanted to buy a new car and take over payments when I can. But I chose the other option of having them buy a car that was more in my price range of $2000-3000. As of yet, I am still looking and so is my Dad. We may have found one, but you never know. Once I know, YOU will know. But let's have a moment of silence for my poor deceased "grandma" car. You will be missed Phoebe :(

Me and my Sister Julia camping at Vallecito Lake the weekend before I left

A sign at the campground, just in case you didn't know what the bathrooms were for.

My Sister Misha and I out to dinner with SOME of the fam

Misha, Me, My Mom and Julia at Dinner

Me having to sit on the huge duffle bag full of clothes so that I could zip it up

My Dad, Me and my Mom before I left

The view from my car looking on as my Dad tows me with his Truck

Oh and I hit a dog with the car yesterday. It was pretty much the worst day ever..for me AND the dog

Backyard Campout

I realized the other day that I haven't been camping with my friends this summer, so I decided to have a backyard campout with my girls last night. It was soo flippin fuN! We had a blast being silly and roasting hot dogs and making smores and just having girl talk. My friend Casey and I were the only ones that slept in the tent. My other 3 friends couldn't stay the night, but we still had fun!

All by Myself

So on MOnday I accomplished a huge feat! I rotated the tires on my car!..all by myself!...WITHOUT my Dad. He wasn't even in town! HOw awesome is that?! I was so proud of myself. But I was also super dirty. Tires are greasy and dirty...also, it was hot so I was sweaty. So I jumped into our pool afterwards. All in all it was a productive day! YAY!

Update...sorta

So..lately I've been in a weird mood. Like the kinda mood where I laugh and think stupid things are funny. I mean, it's not a bad thing, cuz I like to laugh. My mom just thinks I'm a weirdy,but is she really wrong? I don't think so. I just tried to write a blog post and my computer erased it or something and now I have no idea what I just wrote, I only know that it was funny and made me laugh. (Yes I crack myself up)

My mom just bought one of those back yard pools and I am so excited. My plan is to lay in the grass and get super hot and then take a flying leap into the pool, which can be abbreviated into a Fleap! Also, yesterday was a pretty good day because I did not have to mow my lawn thanks to my powers of persuasion. Can life get any better? I submit that it cannot! I was talking to my friend Ben and I might have mentioned that I have to go mow the lawn and I hate it and he totally offered to do it!! Awesome? totally! I even got pictures to document this spectacular event. Aren't you so proud? Wouldn't be the first time I got someone to mow the lawn for me. Thats just how amazing my persuasion skills are. Maybe I should use them for something else? Chinese food? Carebears? The possibilities are endless

In other news, I still don't have a freakin job, and while that sounds like an awesome summer plan, it has its downs. Like the whole not having any money thing. The whole sleeping in and staying in my pajamas is nice, but doing nothing all the time is exhausting. So my dad told me he would pay me to wash the Sheriffs Department Helicopters. Nice, except everytime I do I slip and fall like a baby giraffe on the helipad. (that sheriffs star is super slippery) Also, as a new low in my life, I am a backup Janitor for my brother in laws brother. LIke when people realize they are janitors and try to go do something with their life and call in to work, I get called in to clean up the mess...literally. But hey, money is money and I need to pay my cell phone bill and buy some more itunes and another hole in my head, cuz that's how much I need the itunes.

Oh but the other weekend, I went camping with my Mom and Dad and then met the Institute the next morning in Durango to go on a rafting trip! Good times were had that weekend.

sooo That's all I can think of right now. I must get back to my pathetic existence of life

of doing nothing.