Finally

So alot has changed for me. I finally found my laugh again...it's been a while. My last post was sad, but I am over that whole situation and am totally better off. He turned out to be one of the biggest jerks I have ever met, even if he was cute! The hurt is still there in my heart and it probably will be for a while, but at least I don't cry over him anymore; he doesn't deserve it anyways. I think the hurt will be here for a while, but at least I'm on the path to healing. I'm starting to feel like myself again. I started laughing easily yesterday and it was such a relief. I didn't think I'd ever get over it. But I FINALLY realized I'm worth more that pining and mourning over someone who is a total jerk and doesn't deserve me!
In the words of Marilyn Monroe, "If you can't handle me at my worst, you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best" Holla!

Life is not the way I planned

My LIfe is not going the way I planned, but I guess I shouldn't have expected it too. The whole dating thing has not gone the way I wanted, or even not wanted..it's been soo much worse. It consumes me and I really shouldn't let it. It's ridiculous that I can let someone have this much control over me, when he doesn't even care anything about me. He says the meanest things sometimes and yet, here I am still holding on. With the help of my friends, I've decided to delete him from my phone..to try and distance myself. We'll see how that goes. I just wish there was a delete button on my heart...